in calicut....and am homesick...:((
the past three days have been quite eventful with me trying to pack all my calicut bound luggage and getting thru with all the formalities for the work left half done by me. then as usual fell very depressed and sad on saturday for having to leave after having enjoyed every minute of my 3 month stay in chennai. slept like a log, ate really well (notwithstanding the fact that i lost 8 kgs in these 3 months in chennai!!!!!), met all the people, made new friends and freaked out almost on a daily basis and ofcourse my favourite spot...marina beach used to visit it everyday.
and now i am feeling like i will go on crying for days and days together yearning for that cuddle of my mummy and those happy days at my home. had indulged myself a bit too much, that is one reason i am feeling the pinch of it. the day had been unusually long with every moment of it occupied by the memories of my mother and they refuse to die down no matter what. am trying to keep my mind engaged with something or the other so that i dont get back those memories but still they come back torture me and make my heart weep. this i guess will remain so atleast for the next few days before something more important takes the frontseat.
have changed my hostel this year and that is one more reason for me feeling lonely right since the time i landed here. everything seems so new and strange to me that it will take time for me get adjusted to this new scheme of things. the registration is scheduled for tomm but i heard that the classes begin on wednesday so have some time to recoup myself and prepare myself for a braced fight this time.
have been thinking about how much pains my mother has taken in trying to see that everything goes on fine for me. and in the recent past, i have seen that my mother has been really worried about my state of health and other things and how she has tried her best to see that i am always free from any ailments or any worries as such. what a perfect mom she is. and i havent done anything to repay all this. shame on me. maybe it is time for me change for the better before it is too late. i can do a lot of things to give her comfort, behaviour wise i am her perfect son since i get along with all the relatives really fine, but other things i am not upto her mark, i am too coward and she is too bold...sounds odd but she is brave, she is bold, she is dominating type. wish i were like her but i am not. and this is one area she doesnt like in me and my health, she feels that i cannot take care of myself and she is right, but i am improving i am a lot better than what i was some years ago, here at iimk one of the things that i learnt was to look after myself without any support from any side.
have some responsibilites towards my family too. wish i realised them soon enough and got my act together and tried to improve the state of things at my father's end. feeling sleepy, will continue this some other day.
the past three days have been quite eventful with me trying to pack all my calicut bound luggage and getting thru with all the formalities for the work left half done by me. then as usual fell very depressed and sad on saturday for having to leave after having enjoyed every minute of my 3 month stay in chennai. slept like a log, ate really well (notwithstanding the fact that i lost 8 kgs in these 3 months in chennai!!!!!), met all the people, made new friends and freaked out almost on a daily basis and ofcourse my favourite spot...marina beach used to visit it everyday.
and now i am feeling like i will go on crying for days and days together yearning for that cuddle of my mummy and those happy days at my home. had indulged myself a bit too much, that is one reason i am feeling the pinch of it. the day had been unusually long with every moment of it occupied by the memories of my mother and they refuse to die down no matter what. am trying to keep my mind engaged with something or the other so that i dont get back those memories but still they come back torture me and make my heart weep. this i guess will remain so atleast for the next few days before something more important takes the frontseat.
have changed my hostel this year and that is one more reason for me feeling lonely right since the time i landed here. everything seems so new and strange to me that it will take time for me get adjusted to this new scheme of things. the registration is scheduled for tomm but i heard that the classes begin on wednesday so have some time to recoup myself and prepare myself for a braced fight this time.
have been thinking about how much pains my mother has taken in trying to see that everything goes on fine for me. and in the recent past, i have seen that my mother has been really worried about my state of health and other things and how she has tried her best to see that i am always free from any ailments or any worries as such. what a perfect mom she is. and i havent done anything to repay all this. shame on me. maybe it is time for me change for the better before it is too late. i can do a lot of things to give her comfort, behaviour wise i am her perfect son since i get along with all the relatives really fine, but other things i am not upto her mark, i am too coward and she is too bold...sounds odd but she is brave, she is bold, she is dominating type. wish i were like her but i am not. and this is one area she doesnt like in me and my health, she feels that i cannot take care of myself and she is right, but i am improving i am a lot better than what i was some years ago, here at iimk one of the things that i learnt was to look after myself without any support from any side.
have some responsibilites towards my family too. wish i realised them soon enough and got my act together and tried to improve the state of things at my father's end. feeling sleepy, will continue this some other day.
posted by Vikram Jain at 12:38 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home